


Shenandoah

by random_nerd_posts



Series: Shenandoah [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: A lot of death but very few revivals, Ben Solo redemption fic, But I don't know how to do them, DarkPilot, Did I mention gore, F/M, Forced miscarriage, Gore, I'm a whumper so I will destroy the character's hearts as well as yours, I'm an anti-reylo so no don't even ask, JediPilot, Kylux - Freeform, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Please heed the death, RoseRey - Freeform, Snoke "kills" Kylo Ren so he goes back to Ben Solo, So Bear With me, Stormpilot, There might be a slowburn, also death, porn with plot (one chapter (in chapter 6 ONLY)), some non-con mentioned in second chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:24:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22820173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/random_nerd_posts/pseuds/random_nerd_posts
Summary: Please heed the tags, and when I working through the fic and you see I didn't tag something, please tell me and I'll fix it!~*~*~“Can we see Bella now?” Armitage’s voice was hoarse, from crying. Still dehydrated despite the attempts of his loved ones to refuel him as the hours passed. The doctor nodded as he waited for them to wake up Emily. Then they went to the ICU. The scent was purely sick old people. They saw Bella, and she had on a mask and a mass of tubes. Armitage ran up to her, cupping her chin. He smothered her face with kisses and soft kind words while being as conscious of the equipment as possible. Ben sat next to the bed, kissing Bella on the head and hugging her.~*~*~Kylo opened her eyes and went to rub them, but the swelling in her hand from punching the wall made her wince. She reviewed the extent of the bruising. She couldn’t even move her finger. Sighing, she cursed herself as she caught the sight of the dent in the wall.Getting dressed, she made a visit to the med bay, something that just reminded her of that horrid night, ignoring the phantom pain in her side.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo, Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren, Finn/Rose Tico, Original Female Character/Original Male Character, Poe Dameron/Finn, Poe Dameron/Rey, Rey/Rose Tico
Series: Shenandoah [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1684771
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Alright, so this is a larger project I'm working on. This is called Shenandoah because the song composed by Frank Ticheli is a gem and the meaning behind it is perfect.
> 
> This is his wording for why Mr. Ticheli wrote composed the piece:
> 
> _"In my setting of Shenandoah I was inspired by the freedom and beauty of the folk melody and by the natural images evoked by the words, especially the image of a river. I was less concerned with the sound of a rolling river than with its life-affirming energy – its timelessness. Sometimes the accompaniment flows quietly under the melody; other times it breathes alongside it. The work’s mood ranges from quiet reflection, through growing optimism, to profound exaltation."_
> 
> And if you want to give it a listen you can find a nice recording of it on YouTube and on Spotify. I'll put the links in the end note.
> 
> Also, you can find the beta of this chapter [here](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nolfalvrel/pseuds/Nolfalvrel)

Rey watched the monitor. The Final Order had been quiet. Almost too quiet for such a large empire as they were. She sensed something bad was going to happen on the planet of Jakku-- her home planet-- but she didn’t know where. So, she watched from the main Resistance Bridge.

_ Ding _ . A light flashed. A Resistance spy comm had come in.

Rey accepted the call eagerly as she knew that there was not much time for him to state what was going on. And since it had been almost a month since the last leak, there was a clear lull going on in the First Order.

The screen popped up showing the Colonel of the First Order.

“What is the news, Colonel Mitaka?” Mitaka had a scar on his neck from when he was previously cut doing this kind of work behind Snoke’s back.

“The Final Order has a new force user. She’s strong in the force as well as physique. Please be careful Jedi Rey.”

“What name does she go under?”

“Kylo Ren," Rey's eyes squinted in both confusion and disbelief, and she clenched her hands into fists.  _ So, the Final Order is mocking us. Fine, but we will not lose this fight _ , she thought as Dopheld finished his sentence. "She was captured by the Final Order at the age of seven and taught to use the force from there. Rumours say she’s from Earth, but I was never able to confirm it.” 

At the mention of the planet, Rey can’t help but think of Ben, and feels cold when she remembers the despair that had ripped through the Force ten years ago. Of course. It would be so like the Final Order to take advantage of such a tragedy, finding some hapless orphan and twisting them in their image.

“Is she located on Jakku?” Mitaka nodded, causing Rey to sigh in defeat. “Will you be traced back to us?”

“No. This is purely private, Jedi.”

“Okay, be safe, Colonel.”

“Same for you and your crew, Rey,” the call ended.

Rey sighed again, pressing a button, requesting a comm between General Poe Dameron and Head Technician Rose Tico.

“Hey Babe!” Rose greeted excitedly.

“What’d you find out sunshine?” Poe asked with a wink.

“We got intel about a new force user within the Final Order,” Rose and Poe’s demeanor went cold.

“Like, on Jakku? The only planet the Final Order still hasn’t touched?” Rose asked as Rey nodded. “See, this is why I said we needed to contact Ben to get his ass in gear.”

“You remember how I collapsed when I sensed his despair?” Rey disagreed. “There’s no way he’s recovered from what happened!”

“Yeah, but this is the reason why we need him. A new force user within the order is bad news!” Rose bit back.

“What does the force user go as?” Poe asked, waiting for Rose to stop interrupting Rey.

“She goes under the name Kylo Ren. She was captured as a child and brought up under the Order’s doctrine. We don’t know much about her-- but I think they discovered her around the time that I sensed something wrong with Ben.”

“So they probably wanted to make sure he was… well, the way he is, before trying to manipulate a new force user again.”

Rey grimaced, and nodded.

“Do you think if we at least told him about her--” Poe started, but Rey was quick to cut him off.

“She’s his replacement Poe. They would have told her all about the old Kylo, all his weaknesses with the Force, what they’d done to him before-- before he moved on. Couple that with his current state and she would decimate him.”

“I think we need to go to Jakku,” Rose nodded in agreement with Poe.

Rey shook her head. “I’ll go. You guys need to be here on the bridge while I’m away.” 

Poe nodded, but it was reluctant. Rose wasn’t happy, and unlike their friend, did not hold back.

“We go as a team,” Rose stated firmly.

“If something happens to me, then what would happen to you guys if I got stuck on Jakku? We’d lose all of the leaders of the Resistance in one go. You will stay on the Bridge, as I’ve ordered, when you guys get back here. Got it?” Rey was starting to lose her patience. She couldn’t lose anyone else because of her mistakes, especially since her last big one got Finn killed. She had to do this herself, no one could make her change her mind.

“May the Force be with you, Rey,” Poe responded, ending his comm connection.

“Good luck, Rey,” Rose said begrudgingly as she too ended the comm connection.

“Thanks guys,” Rey held her lightsaber, testing it as it lit a bright yellow.

~*~*~

Kylo landed her ship, the  _ Shenandoah _ , on Jakku. Once leaving, she touched her side to remember her father’s lightsaber was still attached to her hip, which she was grateful that she didn’t forget. She’d done it once before, surprisingly, and nearly paid for it with her life. If she hadn’t been so skilled with the force, the story could have had a much different ending. Stepping onto the sand, her foot sunk slightly into the soft ground. It caused her foot to turn sideways, but she regained her balance quickly as she struggled to walk on the uneven ground after being on her ship for so long.

She wanted that scavenger that her father, the original Kylo Ren, sought to control all those years ago. And what better way to track the old bitch than where the scavenger had started out. In the middle of nowhere, on the planet of Jakku.

“We search and question. No killing until we have the answers we need. Got it?” Kylo demanded of her troops, her voice piercing through the mask, even though it made her sound robotic.

_ Search the portions dealer, my child _ . Snoke spoke to Kylo through the force. She nodded, forgetting that she had to answer him.  _ Answer when I speak to you, you ungrateful brat! _

_ Yes, Master Snoke. I’ll search him. Anyone else in particular? _

_ No. No one else knows about Rey Palpatine _ .

_ Of course, Master. If he doesn’t have the answer, I shall strike him down then? _

_ Yes, my dear _ . They broke off their link as Kylo trudged towards the portions dealer, named Unkar Plutt. He looked like a blobfish and smelled like one too. And, he was seeing a line of people.

“New demands from Supreme Leader Snoke. I’ll question the blobfish. You’ll wait for me to finish. Once I finished questioning the bastard, we kill any witnesses,” all the Stormtroopers hissed a “yessir” at Kylo as she stepped to Unkar, shoving the person who was in the middle of a conversation with the blobfish, out of her way.

“Hey, I- “Kylo cut her off with a wave of her hand.

“You are done bargaining with this Blobfish.” 

The aggrieved woman recited the phrase in first person as she walked away with nothing gained. The Stormtroopers took her by the arm and promptly “tranquilized” her. In actuality it was a gun used by the Final Order to send neurons to the brain, slowing the waves of activity, silently and painlessly killing the victim. Kylo thought it was useless, but Snoke brought up that when she questioned one person, there was no need for extra panic that could ruin the plan, so she took advantage of it.

“Who are you and why are you tormenting my customers?” Kylo chucked as she drew the lightsaber at her side. Igniting it, it crackled to life, shooting to the right of Unkar’s neck.

“We are with the Final Order and we demand to know where the scavenger, Rey Palpatine is!” Unkar huffed in amusement.

“Who are you supposed to be dressed up as, a bulkier version of Kylo Ren? Sorry honey, but take the pillows out of your armor and get down from your little platforms honey. This is just sad to see,” Unkar teased the girl, who used the force to bring him to her face.

“I am Kylo Ren. And I am looking for Rey Palpatine. Do not make me repeat myself again.” She released his shirt, sending him flying backwards, knocking down his little shack.

“S-she’s not here! She’s off with the resistance. I haven’t seen her since she ran away with the Millennium Falcon with this black kid!”

“And this happened how long ago?” Unkar attempted to catch his breath, attempting to get up, but Kylo kept him pinned to the ground.

“A little over eighteen years ago.” 

Kylo walked up to the man, readying to swing her sword before she stopped. Looking down at him through her mask. Deactivating the saber, she took her foot up and smashed the man’s skull in with a single stomp.

“Kill everyone here!” 

The stormtroopers opened fire.

~*~*~

Bella was tugged by her arm by an old man. 

She saw the bomb go off, sending dirt, red and limbs flying. She saw her papa cover her, trying to protect her as he got hit with a blast. She sensed something leaving him, but she didn’t understand it, she knew it was bad as she tried to wake him up. She was alone and she couldn’t stop crying, even if she wanted to.

Then the man came.

They stopped. The man turned and knelt next to her, grabbing her by the shoulders, gripping them too tight. He got close to her face. He was scary to Bella and he knew this as he used it to his advantage.

“Stop your blubbering and look at me you foolish girl,” Bella couldn’t stop crying, even when the strong hand that was on her left shoulder left and slammed into her cheek. “Shut up!”

“I want my Papa!” she screamed, earning herself another slap on her face.

“Your dad’s dead, you idiotic girl!” that was when Bella went to whimpers.

“But my dad wasn’t in the park, my papa was. What does dead mean?” Pryde’s eyes widened and then tightened in anger.

“Dead means that the person isn’t coming back to save you,” more tears fell down Bella’s face as her lip quivered.

“I miss my dad and papa. Why can’t I see them?” Pryde stood up, picking up the girl and walked the rest of the way to Snoke, as Bella slid into a dreamless sleep from exhaustion.

~*~*~

Kylo was about to board the ship when she felt a presence. A force user, and a strong one at that. Turning around, it was a petite woman with an activated lightsaber. The light was shining yellow.

“Kylo Ren, I’m here to stop you,” the woman said. Kylo chuckled, morphing it into a hearty laughter, shoulders shaking with each holler.

“Stop me from what? Killing all those people? I’m sorry, but the deed’s already done, Rey Palpatine,” Kylo finished with a robotic hiss at the end of her sentence.

“Something seems familiar about you. I just can’t place it, but it’s something about your aura,” Rey said, gripping her lightsaber tighter. Kylo noticed that as she drew her lightsaber activating it, hearing the crackling of the sword roar to life in her hand. “But, that doesn’t matter. You may look like him,” She gestured to Kylo’s setup, “but you definitely don’t talk like him.” Rey could feel the anger rising in the girl, so she had to change the topic. “What was your mission about? Taking me in for questioning? Locating someone of higher status?”

“No. My goal is simple. To kill the last light side force user. My masters want to rule, and they can’t do that with you ruining everything,” Kylo stated, no emotion behind her words “But, I’ll make sure that my aura is the last thing you remember when I decapitate your sorry little ass.”

“I won’t let you destroy any more lives,” Rey commanded, “but we’ll see about that aura thing.” She smirked just slightly as she gripped her lightsaber in both hands and ran towards Kylo.

~*~*~

Poe and Rose landed, running towards the bridge where everyone gathered around the console as they watched the duel between the new Kylo Ren and General Rey Tico. Poe could only watch in disbelief as he saw the massive build of Rey’s enemy.

“That’s Kylo Ren?” Poe asked no one in general.

“Yes, General Dameron,” Major Connix responded, never taking her eyes from the screen.

“She’s massive. Do we know of her origins?” Poe demanded.

“Other than what our intel on the Final Order has told us, nothing,” Major Connix answered again.

“How long has the battle been going on?” Rose asked. Her appearance showed nothing but strength, but the way she asked showed all her fear for her wife.

Major Connix responded once more, “At least five hours, Mrs. Tico.”

The bridge was quiet, minus a few people praying for Rey’s survival against the behemoth fighting her. Then they started to slip.

“Kylo’s getting tired,” Poe said with a smirk.

“So is Rey,” Rose said, fear reaching her eyes.

The two women struck their swords against each other, causing a horrid hissing noise to sound as they clashed. And then Kylo’s leg slid in the sand, causing her to fall back. She swung at Rey, who jumped back.

Landing on her feet, Rey panted as she smelled burnt flesh. Looking down, she saw the wound. She hadn’t moved fast enough. She collapsed; her intestines spilled as Kylo’s saber had slid just deep enough that her skin split and blood poured, but the wound never cauterized.

Looking up, she saw Kylo walking up to her. “You planned the strike,” Rey stated, out of breath, fear rising as she saw her own end. Before, when she’d felt the Force, it had come naturally, easily, but she’d still had to reach for it.

Now, she felt swollen with it. Could feel everything living thing in it.

She was dying.

“No,” Kylo responded, standing tall above her. “I went too low. I meant to hit either your heart or your throat.”

The final blow for Rey was when Kylo took Rey’s own lightsaber and decapitated the smaller woman, sending the jedi to the light side, but not before she whispered. 

“Find the light, Bella.”

As Poe watched from the screen, he held Rose to his chest-- he’d been doing so since Rey took the fake opening. He watched, horrified, as the slip Kylo suffered became an advantage, and she delivered the first fatal blow to the Resistance’s last hope of winning against the Final Order.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find the beta of the chapter [here]()

Ben woke up hugging his husband, Armitage Hux. He nuzzled his face into the man’s neck. A small chuckle was heard from the slimmer male. Ben planted kisses trailing down Armitage’s back; the man in question arched his back in arousal, moaning in delight.

The colors were bright. Nearly too bright for them to be real. Ben didn’t care, he was with the man he loved. Laying in bed, worshipping the man who deserved the world. 

An alarm went off. Ben groaned in disappointment as he laid on top of the other man, slightly hard. He pouted, but then smiled as he heard the noises of shuffling from the bedroom down the hall.

“Happy birthday, dear,” Ben grinned, kissing Armitage on the lips, sucking in the bottom one, loving it as Armitage fought to control the contact. Ben loved everything about his husband. He loved the silver strands appearing in the fire red mess of hair. He loved the man’s always kissable lips, his curved hips. He loved that Armitage loved art and children. Ben just loved Armitage because the man was unique and so very special.

“Oh, great, reminding this old fart that he’s forty-two today?” Armitage chuckled, placing a final peck on Ben’s lips as he moved to get up. Ben rolled over onto his back, looking over at the man as Armitage moved to the bathroom to take a shower.

Ben had a plan. He’d told Bella about the surprise party he had planned for her papa as a wonderful birthday present. He had convinced Armitage to take Bella to the park today as he set up the apartment with the help of Emily, the babysitter who, even though she was a foot shorter than Ben, kicked ass to protect Bella no matter the circumstances. That meant stabbing the crap out of murderous clowns.

Ben got dressed as he ran over to Bella’s room. She was a tall, skinny girl. Taller than most boys her age, but it never did make her upset. And, she was still in her frilly yellow  _ SpongeBob _ pajamas.

“Bella, come on. You need to get ready. You and Papa are going to the park today,” Bella’s eyes widened in excitement.

“The park? Daddy, can you help me?” Ben playfully rolled his eyes.

“Do you have an outfit picked out?” Bella shook her head. “Okay, let’s get you something to wear before you take off your nightwear. Alright?”

“Yes, daddy,” Bella responded, distracted, her attention drawn to a small toy horse on her dresser.

Once Bella was dressed, she set about working on her Velcro tennis shoes as Ben combed her hair out of her face, pulling it apart into two halves, braiding each side from her forehead. As soon as he was done with her hair, she brushed her teeth with Armitage and got her coat on. The leaves were changing color. Ben liked the change of the weather; autumn was his favorite season because everything was so beautiful. Too bad it was gorgeous as everything was dying.

As soon as Bella finished, she put on her windbreaker, and Armitage slid on his jacket, which was too big on him, but too small on Ben. Before they left the apartment, Armitage swung back, kissing Ben and savoring the moment.

“I love you, Ben,” Armitage breathed out a whisper as he smiled, increasing the small wrinkles settling on his face.

“I love you too, Armitage.”

Then they left. 

Everything turned dark as Ben heard beeping. Grunting, he opened his eyes. 

The scenery of his bedroom was grey and depressing. Something he’s been accustomed to for the past ten years since the bombing of Downtown Seattle, killing hundreds, including Bella and Armitage.

“I don’t want to get up,” Ben grunted to himself, scratching his matted beard. He stunk like sweat and drunk vomit. He needed a shower, but he didn’t care enough to do anything. He wasn’t expecting company anytime soon, so why bother cleaning himself, or the apartment up.

The beeping was still going. Ben used his fist and slammed the alarm to pieces, processing what he’d done in the next moment, groaning. He would need to buy yet another alarm clock this month.

Sitting up in the dark, he sensed his surroundings. He instantly grimaced when his hand grazed the side of the bed where Armitage had slept--in ten years, he's never touched that side of the bed. Now it just felt like he was touching a foreign object.

Shoving the covers, he felt the dust that stuck to his fingers. Ignoring it, he stood up. Walking out of the room, he nonchalantly picked up last night’s unfinished bottle of beer and went into the bathroom. There, he opened his daily-reminder pill container and downed it with the last of the liquid yeast in a bottle. Then, uncaring, he let the bottle smash into the bin, and went to go do some laundry because that was something that needed to be done, and it was the least likely to get broken in a fit of rage and self-pitying sorrow. 

Then Ben would go to the bar and stay there all day, waiting to succumb to death.

Walking to the giant pile of dirty laundry, Ben glanced at the basket full of clean clothes that Millicent used to sleep in-- but even she had left him for the great beyond. Now it was dirty with patches of orange fur.

“I’ll start with this,” Ben said to no one, ignoring the basket in desperate need of cleaning. Instead he picked up the clothes from the floor, stuffed them into a garbage bag and went to the laundry room supplied by the apartment.

Entering the warm room full of machines, Ben sensed three people there. He couldn’t see them stick their nose up at him, though probably not the wisest decision on their part as he stunk of yesterday’s alcohol and ten years of melancholy. Shoving the laundry into the washer and starting it up, he thumped onto the bench. Content to sit silently and wallow in a loss of hope and constant wishing of death.

At this point, it was routine.

“What a great way to spend your days. Huh, Ben?” he heard Rey ask him. But he couldn’t sense her life force, so he decided to ignore her. If he couldn’t sense her life force, then she wasn’t there and he was finally going crazy. “The Resistance needs you, Ben,” Rey continued to him, heedless of the people in the room, and Ben stolidly remained silent. “The Final Order has a new enemy, Ben.”

Sighing, he stood up and trudged back to his room. Once the door clicked shut, he went to the cupboards and got out a half empty bottle of strong whiskey. He sat on the couch, draining the contents. Detached even as he felt Rey staring at him.

“So, which member of the Final Order killed you?” Ben asked. That much, at least, he could guess.

“A girl calling herself Kylo Ren,” Ben chuckled drily. “But, she’s not just some random force user they picked up from a deserted planet. We know her, Ben. She knows you.”

“Good, maybe she’ll know me enough to want to kill me and end my misery,” Rey scoffed.

“Yeah, because Bella would love to kill her dad.”

Ben looked in the direction of Rey, his eyes narrowed. Wanting her to witness his anger, fierce and warning. “Are you fucking with me right now?” 

He couldn’t see the confusion on Rey’s blue transparent face.

“I-- I don’t understand. Ben, Bella struck me down. I don’t know what happened, but something caused you to fall far from the light and dark side. I can still sense the force in you, but it’s like you gave up on everything. What was it that made you stray so far?” Ben could feel himself losing control of his lungs as he closed his eyes; letting his breaths get shaky as he let go of the bottle of whiskey; letting it tip and pour all over the carpet.

Letting the tears fall. Something that hadn’t happened since his first time at the bar nine years ago, sitting there and feeling the weight of all that had happened, and wanting nothing more than to feel nothing at all. Hatred drove him the next moment. He snatched the bottle of spilled whiskey, standing up. Throwing it. Hearing the pieces splinter into fragments and litter the filthy carpet. 

“I lost everything,” Ben said after a few minutes of quiet as he caught his breath. “And it’s thanks to the Final Order. I will not fight for the Resistance because of hope and all that fairy tale shit you assholes believe in. I just can’t do it anymore. Not after I lost everything that kept me going. I’m going with you to take revenge for everything those fuckers took from me.”

“Thank you, Ben,” Rey started, but stopped when he held a hand up, trying to silence her.

“How did you get the information that Kylo Ren is Bella?” Ben asked, ire rising again.

“We received intel from a spy within the Resistance. His name is Colonel Mitaka,” Ben scoffed, more anger rising.

“Quit lying to me, Rey!” He shouted. “Dopheld died seventeen years ago when Snoke attacked me with his sith lightning! Forcing me to go blind, all because I didn’t want to fucking be an object anymore! Something for him to stick his dick into!” Everything went still as Rey’s and Ben’s eyes widened once they realized what Ben had said. He’d never said anything about Snoke’s  _ affairs _ even to Armitage. He couldn’t put his burdens on top of Armitage’s. It was unfair to him.

“Snoke... raped you?” 

Ben started to hyperventilate as he nodded. He bent down, landing on his knees, pulling his head into his chest. He was completely broken, never bothering to fix the pieces. He felt Rey rubbing his back, trying to console him. She was a ghost now though, and he never truly felt the warmth of her touch. “I’m sorry, Ben. I never knew the extent of the pain.”

“I never told Armitage about it. I’ve never told anyone. It was my secret, and now it’s out to the Force because I’m falling apart, Rey. I’m getting help, but it isn’t helping.”

“What can I do?”

“Leave me to die.”

Rey sighed, shaking her head, contemplating letting the shell of a man live the rest of his life alone and spiraling towards an empty void of nothing. Easily making her choice. “Not until you save the new Kylo Ren from her demise.”

Ben sighed in defeat. No longer wanting to deal with an argument that to anyone else, particularly his neighbours, would seem one-sided. “Will you at least let me fight my demons my way?” 

Rey nodded, then whispered aloud her silent approval, though he could still sense her reluctance. “Then, let’s go kick some Final Order ass.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gosh, I didn't mean to wait almost a month to upload, things have gotten the best of me and the people who look at this in advance were really busy, but alas, I have so much in store for you as up to chapter 8 is written up.
> 
> But, anyway you can find the actual beta of this chapter [here](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nolfalvrel).

It took Ben about an hour to finish his laundry, now that he had someone to urge him to do it. Rey looked at the clumps of fur and smiled slightly at the thought of when she met the sweet little ginger cat. Moving the basket, she saw the collar that Poe had taken off the cat when they stole Millicent from the Starkiller Base. When they had returned to the ship, Leia spotted the cat and instantly fell in love.

_ Knock _ ,  _ knock _ ,  _ knock _ . Rey heard the door open and Ben greeted someone with a surprisingly pleasant attitude. She approached curiously and saw a short girl, around a foot shorter than Ben himself when he wasn’t hunched over.

“I’m so worried about you! Were you at the bar again last night?” Ben sighed, his look softening in shame towards the girl. “You know,” she started, poking at his stomach, “that all that alcohol will make you get a beer belly-- which you have gotten started.”

“I know, Emily. I’m sorry. I--,” Emily cut him off.

“I miss Armitage and Bella too, but you can’t just go moping around as if the world revolves around you. Have you taken your medication yet, Ben?” He nodded. “With or without last night’s beer.” Ben remained silent. “Dammit, Ben. I really worry if you’re going to die from an overdose or take your medicine. You might also be suffering from alcohol poisoning!”

“I understand, Emily. It’s just hard for me to do anything. You know this,” the girl nodded, shuffling her feet.

“I know, but I opened a shop if you’re willing to work there? But you must clean yourself up first,” Ben smirked, but it was full of sorrow and regret. “What's wrong? Something wrong with your kidneys? I mean, if you keep drinking like you are, you’ll have worse things than kidney damage.”

“I’m leaving Earth to fight with the Resistance,” Ben informed her, a tad derisively.

Emily stood straight up.

“Are you sure? I’ve heard the stories; I saw you fight with those people after they put the General on display when Bella was only five. You’re out of practice.”

“I have some help, and we could use all the help we can get. Would you like to help me?” 

Emily nodded without hesitation, “I’ll go because who else is going to help you move around, considering you’re blind as a bat and all.” Ben smirked and nodded. Rey just rolled her eyes playfully as she sat down, ignoring the little tufts of orange fur. 

“Then, let’s go get you packed up. Where’s your shop at?” Ben asked. Rey looked at Emily, intrigued, even though the girl couldn’t see her.

“I bought out the vacant place where the bakery stood,” Emily looked distraught when she saw Ben run his fingers over a picture frame, its face pressed against the table. Rey observed the action with tense palpitations. She wanted to look at it now, but she didn’t want to scare the poor girl away.

“Are the pictures still there?” Emily nodded, picking up the turned over picture that Rey wanted to look at.

“This is when Armitage went to school to work on his PhD in engineering, right? He had just finished getting his Masters.” 

Ben gave a jerky nod in return. “He was determined to have a Doctorate to be able to run two different businesses.” 

Emily chuckled. “Yeah, I remember him telling me that he found trigonometric identities entertaining. That’s something you only hear from supervillains.” Rey laughed at that, but stopped when she got an awkward glance from Ben.

Emily put the picture down, facing up, and Rey leaned in to look at it, touching the side of the frame, shifting it just slightly. It was a photo of Ben in glasses, hugging Armitage in a graduation gown and cap while he held Bella in his loose arm. Her arms were around his neck as she leaned her head on Ben’s. They were happy.

“Um, the picture just moved. What the fuck just happened?” Emily squeaked, clearly shaken. 

_ Shit _ , Rey thought as she moved away from the photo.

“Well, I have a ghost haunting me. She convinced me to go fight in her place with the resistance,” Emily stared at Ben with her mouth agape, then looked at the couch. Directly at Rey.

“Well, can you… hear her talk to you?” 

“Yes,” Ben nodded, a smile leaning onto his lips, “And if I could see, I would be able to observe her too. But, only force users can see other deceased force users.” Emily nodded as she walked to the couch, searching for something that made her believe that Ben wasn’t insane.

“Will she be joining us on our way to the Resistance?” Rey put her hand on Emily’s hand and immediately Emily saw the gorgeous blue figure in front of her. “Wait… I… saw you the day the Final Order attacked Earth! When Bella was a five-year-old darling!” 

Rey smiled and chuckled, “Yes, I remember you as well. I also remember knowing you as only ‘the babysitter’.” 

Emily nodded, removing her hand, but not losing sight of Rey. “I think when I saw you pummel those soldiers with your bow staff, I thought you were the strongest and hottest person in the universe. I know it’s nothing like the bow staff that you used, but I do know how to shoot a bow.” 

Rey snorted, “Use that to your advantage, Emily.” The shorter girl blushed, tilting her head down as she backed up, almost instantly trying to disappear.

“Now you act bashful?” Ben asked, smirking.

“I’m sorry, but I act like a normal human being at weird intervals, thank you very much,” Emily said, sticking her nose up in the air playfully, her face never leaving the tomato pigment.

“Well, maybe we should go and get the stuff we need to get back to the Resistance,” Rey cut in with a small smile, and Ben hummed in agreement.

~*~*~

The ride to the store was short and quiet. Rey sat in the back as she saw Ben slump in the passenger’s seat. These machines were simple, but efficient, she concluded as she rubbed her hands on the leather seats that were clean but stained with painful memories.

When Emily turned the key left in the ignition of the machine, which she seemed too small for in the first place, the machine stopped vibrating. Rey slid out the door, literally, and saw Emily go help Ben out to the side pavement where only people walked. Rey liked how simple and efficient everything was.

Once everyone was on the pavement, Emily walked up to the door, holding Ben’s hand. He wasn’t smiling, but his eyes weren’t showing he hated it. Rey noticed that he was happy to be interacting with him. It was almost like they haven’t done this in a while.

Phasing through the wall, Rey’s eyes caught wind of a picture on the counter. Walking over to it, she picked it up and saw it was Ben kissing Armitage on the forehead. They were happy, but Bella wasn’t in the picture.

“Ah, that was when I was babysitting Bella and my ex-girlfriend took a picture of them being cute. She’s a professional photographer actually,” Rey looked at Emily. She had none of the stereotypes that would lead one to believe she dated girls.

“Are you dating anyone right now?” Emily chuckled but shook her head.

“No. I haven’t found the right person yet, and since the incident in the park, not many people tolerate my depressive mood swings, so they leave me and go onto social media and say the worst things about me because I’m too sad.”

Ben looked at Emily with a shocked expression. His mouth was agape as his eyes said, “Why didn’t you say something?” Emily caught on and let go of Ben’s hand and took the picture from Rey’s hands.

“Well, less about me. Tell me, who were you with before you passed away.” 

Rey looked down with a bashful smirk, chuckling fondly. If force ghosts could blush, Rey was on fire. “I was married to a woman. Her name is Rose Tico and she’s an amazing mechanic. Poe and I tried to get her to lead with us and she responded with ‘I am leading, but I like doing it from the sidelines to make sure everything is functioning smoothly.’” 

Emily nodded in understanding, breathing in as she remembered the last girl she liked. “So, she’s smart?” 

“She’s super smart,” Rey nodded, tearing up. “And that’s like the best trait she has other than being the most beautiful girl I loved with her nice little love handles. She’s perfect.” Emily set the picture face down on the counter.

“We gotta get my stuff packed so we can leave,” Rey watched Emily take Ben’s hand as they headed towards the back. Rey followed behind, noticing the kitchen.

“You said this was a bakery?” 

This time Ben nodded.

“Armitage and I ran it before he passed away. After that, it was just torture, so I sold it to the bank and just got disability and became the local drunk,” Ben’s voice cracked at the end of the sentence, betraying his apathy as he slipped back into silence. Rey didn’t miss the single tear falling on a loose wooden board that Ben skillfully stepped over.

Emily let Ben keep walking as she stepped towards Rey. “It’s been hard for both of us since some asshole bombed the downtown park. There were three bombs that went off, the second one killing Armitage and Bella. Ben took it kind of hard, of course. But as for me, every now and then, going from work, I drive to the school Bella went to and realize I’m going to go pick up that little ray of sunshine,” Emily murmured. Rey nodded, not sure how to respond. Emily continued, “I’ve upped my meds since that incident, and I thought that this shop might do the trick, but if Ben is going to fight these asshats, then I’m going too.”

Rey remained silent as she watched Emily follow Ben to gather her things.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the random updates, but both me and my beta are busy with own own lives that it's hard to keep up with constant updates. I'm also in not a great head space as of recently just because that's me mood for the week I guess. But, I want to let you guys to know that I'm half way through chapter 10 (not writing a whole lot right now because online school and persona life things happening), but everything will be fine.
> 
> Like usual, you can find my beta [here](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nolfalvrel).
> 
> P.S. I would like to point out that I got someone on a server that was saying men things about my fic on a discord server that I'm not apart of anymore, but please tell me in the comments or message me on [Tumblr](https://random-nerd-posts.tumblr.com) if you want clarification because I've been working really hard on this and I don't want people dissing this because they aren't fully understanding the story. Also, if you have a question about the story, like where it didn't make sense to you if it had a plot hole or something, please point that out to me. I'll correct it in a oneshot, or extent the chapter at some point. I'm open to making this experience just as exciting for you as it is for myself.
> 
> Alright, rant over. Please enjoy yourselves and please be safe, clean and healthy during this time.
> 
> Also (ignore my cringy Slime Rancher loving self) Stay Wiggly.

Kylo stood in front of Snoke. She tried not to notice the old blood stain to her left that had imprinted there as a little girl. To her, it was an ancient stain. To Snoke, it was just another beating he instilled on the original Kylo Ren.

She had been standing there for several minutes now, awaiting the other supreme leader of the Final Order, Palpatine, as he was falling ill from being the original Sith Lord, to Kylo’s understanding.

“Supreme Leader Snoke,” Kylo began, meekly as her helmet had been removed before entering the throne room.

“Yes, Knight Ren?” Snoke answered back, locking eyes with the seventeen-year-old giant.

“Is Supreme Leader Palpatine okay?” Snoke cocked his head a bit. “I know his health is struggling, but I do apologize for being impatient. I’m just wondering how much longer we’ll have to sit here, waiting for his arrival.”

Snoke chuckled. He was genuinely pleased to see the youthfulness in the girl. “I think he’ll be here shortly. I do enjoy the naivete you bring to this fleet, Kylo. It makes everything seem brighter.” 

Kylo stiffened, giving a short nod, “I mean, everything seems to be going smoothly since I killed that treacherous Enric Pryde.” 

Snoke nodded in return, “Yes, and we are all grateful for your loyalty to the First Order.” 

Kylo shuffled her feet in apprehension, feeling queasy at the thought of elaborating on that particular item to Supreme Leader Snoke. Thankfully she didn’t have to say much as a strike of lightning flew past her left shoulder, just missing her neatly balled up box-braids.

It struck Supreme Leader Snoke in the chest, and he spasmed and collapsed. The Force knocked down the chair, causing it to slam on the back corner, falling on its left side as Snoke lay in a motionless, smoking heap. He was incapacitated. Kylo breathed out a sigh as she stood there passively, shaking in her boots as she tried not to gag at the medical scent from Darth Sidious behind her.

“Are you not going to greet the other Supreme Leader, Bella?” Supreme Leader Palpatine asked as he laid his bony hand on her upper left arm. He was too shrunken and weak now to put it on her shoulder.

Taking in a small, but deep breath, Kylo looked down at the short old man and took his hand as she aided him to the vacated chair, ignoring the tubes coming out of his arms. She didn’t want to be reminded of the bastard all those years ago, or her knife wound. Once they got Palpatine sitting down, Kylo went back down to the center of the room and knelt on her right knee.

“What have you learned of my granddaughter, Bella?” 

She hated that name. She hated being reminded of her past. She didn’t want to think of the day her dad left her alone to die as she stared at her papa’s lifeless form. But Kylo didn’t dare correct the Supreme Leader or she would end up dead.

“Rey Palpatine is dead, I killed her, Supreme Leader Palpatine,” Kylo responded, never looking the old man in the eyes. The medical smell was nauseating to her and she felt lightheaded.

“Do you have her lightsaber, Bella?” She nodded as she stood up and took out the lightsaber and activated it, letting the bright yellow illuminate the dark red room. After a few seconds passed, Kylo deactivated it and stepped to hand it to Darth Sidious.

He held up a hand and frowned. “Keep it, dear. Remind yourself of this victory of yours that you gave to the Final Order. Soon, we will obliterate the Resistance and we will have no more setbacks to achieve complete control,” Kylo nodded as she clipped to her belt, feeling it hit her back, reminding her that a wrong move will paralyze her in an instant.

“Am I dismissed, Supreme Leader?” Palpatine shook his head.

“I do have a genuine question, Bella,” they locked eyes, ignoring the stirring of Snoke as he awakened and struggled to stand up.

“And that will be?” Her fists were balled up in irritation now. She hated this smell; she hated her given name and she hated this room. She needed to leave and go back to her quarters.

“Why do you hate the name I call you?” 

The young girl scoffed to herself, but externally, she was driven by years of beaten routine. She instantly stood and looked straight, as if she were apologizing to the almost dead asshole. The words that came were bitterly honest, unwilling to face the consequences of lying. “I dislike it, like I dislike the scent of the med bay that reeks on your skin and clothes. It brings back memories of my past life and I want to forget it.” 

Palpatine actually laughed. “Ben Organa-Solo tried to forget who he was, and it destroyed who he aimed to be, as well as Anakin Skywalker. Do not forget who you were as you strive to become who you destined to be. Now, attend to your duties,” Kylo nodded as she moved to help Snoke with his chair. Palpatine however held her in place. “Not him. Snoke lives in the past, let him work back to the present so he can see the future.”

Kylo relaxed once she was released and walked out of the room without dismissal. When she got back to her quarters, she punched the wall, leaving the dent in the terribly strong metal, glad it was thick enough to betray no sound next door. She then went over to her refresher and promptly gagged, her body forcing itself to throw up in reaction to the lingering medical scent that plagued her head. Once she was done, she stripped, placing the lightsaber with the one she stole from Luke, after fighting him to the death by brute force, and laid in her bead, bare with only her sheets covering her as she held her bruising hand.

It took a few hours for her to drift off to sleep, but all Kylo could think about when she dreamt was that horrid night with her babysitter. The only person that Kylo thought that never abandoned her.

~*~*~

Emily sat on the couch with a dozing off Bella. They had just watched Mulan for the umpteenth time that night. Emily didn’t mind, she liked a strong female lead that could kick ass, where Bella liked it for the songs. What little kid didn’t like Disney movies for the songs?

“Are you ready to go to bed, little woman?” Emily asked, nudging the four-year old’s shoulder. Bella stirred but was sluggish when standing up. She raised her arms, wiping her eyes and Emily took it as a hint to pick up the girl and bring her to Bella’s bedroom.

When she went through the hallway, it was cramped with a few things, but nothing was dirty or out of place. Armitage emphasized the importance of tidiness and was teaching Bella to do the same. Emily loved it so she tried her hardest to mimic him, even if she was still a tiny five-foot slob in her own space, which was just down the hall from Bella.

When she got to Bella’s bedroom, Emily laid the girl down on her rocket bed and tucked her in. Turning around, Emily nearly jumped when she saw a life-size clown doll about 4-feet-tall in the corner of the room.

“Hey, Bella, I didn’t know you liked clowns,” the little girl only nodded as Emily backed out of the room staring at the doll. Her heartbeat never slowed down.

One of the agreements Emily had with Armitage and Ben was that the payment for babysitting Bella would primarily be her taking advantage of the extra room in their apartment. It was convenient for both of them, where they were able to work and enjoy each other’s company often, and she could have a place to live while she worked on her programming degree. The clown in Bella’s room made Emily really unsettled. She’d never seen that doll before, and could recall no time where either of the parents had introduced it to Bella, so something felt off. 

So, she paced the kitchen, and feeling slightly crazy, grabbed a knife from the knife block for comfort before turning on the news. The story running was the image of a man, his face covered in paint, making him look like a clown. 

Emily’s blood turned cold as she realized that the man that was wanted by the police was in Bella’s room.

And on cue a scream ripped from Bella’s room.

Emily darted towards the bedroom, gripping the butcher knife tightly as she saw the man raising a freshly bloody knife from Bella’s stomach. He was laughing, but it stopped when Emily tackled the man and began to stab him repeatedly. Adrenaline drove her, and though the man was tall, he was built like a rake. The knife came out and went in easily. Blood flew. Then she stopped and stood up, tearing off her sweater, sweating and staining her tank top with red as she balled the sweater up on Bella’s wound.

Bella looked at Emily sobbing as the sheets were soaked with blood. Then Emily’s pocket buzzed and dinged with a notification for something. The reminder drove away the shock. Taking her phone out of her pocket, ignoring the blood smearing on her screen, she called the authorities.

Armitage and Ben were out and about enjoying a moment of just them at dinner. Sure, the restaurant wasn’t the best, but it was their time together. They were waiting on their food when Ben felt something  _ off _ . 

And then Armitage’s phone went off.

He answered it, eyeing Ben’s expression of confusion. “Armitage Organa-Solo speaking,” he then responded with yes to a question over the phone, not taking his eyes from Ben, who was now clenching and unclenching his fist. Something was wrong.

_ “We need you and your husband to come to the Seattle Medical Center as soon as possible. There’s been an incident at your apartment.” _

His heart dropped straight to his feet and his stomach rushed to join it. Armitage swallowed. He couldn’t think. He couldn’t breathe, overwhelmed. Ben stared at him, questioning, unable to hear.

_ “Sir, do you understand?” _

He answered in the same way he might have confirmed a status report from a subordinate so many years ago, “Okay, we’ll be right there.” Discipline pulled the emotion from Armitage’s voice. Forgotten, foul discipline, holding him together in a bid to refuse the panic. 

He hung up and looked Ben in the eyes. Forcing himself steady. Still a passive shell relying on sour muscle-memory. “We need to go to the hospital, something has happened,” He stated, so quiet and affectless it was almost a whispered order.

Ben jolted to standing, gripping Armitage and pulling him to his feet hastily, confusion and fear roiling through his gaze. As though seeming to understand the exact nature of Armitage’s reaction, his emotionlessness, Ben nodded, looping an arm around his partner’s shoulders and urging him to the car quickly.

When they got there, the police were in a cleared out waiting room, consoling a bloodied, shaking and sobbing Emily. Ben ran over and brought her into a hug. Armitage just stood there, looking at an officer, his eyes wider than ever; his mouth was agape as he realized that Bella wasn’t there. Finally, the ‘soldier’ part of him seemed to shut off, uninterested in waiting for instructions, and the ‘father’ part kicked back in.

Running up to the officer, he placed his hands on the arms of the fat man, “Where’s my daughter? Where’s Bella?” 

The officer processed the scene before him, that of the sight of two clearly male guardians, and pushed the visibly in-shock man away roughly, scoffing.

“Honestly, her dying would be better than being raised by a couple of fags, in my opinion,” the officer sneered as he stormed away. 

Another officer approached Armitage as his lip curled and his body tensed, the woman grabbing Armitage by the shoulders and guiding him towards a chair.“We don’t have every detail, but there’s been a death in your place of residence.” Armitage gasped, tears welling and pouring down his face as he looked over at Ben, whose glasses were fogged up from his warm tears mixed with the cold air. “It wasn’t your daughter. She’s in surgery right now. Let me explain what happened, and then I’m going to get some information from you, alright?”

The police asked Armitage and Ben a few questions. The officer that shoved Armitage and sneered the slur at him, they learned, was sent home immediately. The officer that aided Armitage, making sure he didn’t have a violent reaction to the comment and perhaps contribute another to the death count, advised she would be waiting around to see if Bella made it out of surgery. Though Armitage was told all the blood on Emily was from the bastard that stabbed his daughter, it did little to soothe the trepidation and fear of waiting.

It wasn’t until he was shaken awake by Ben that he realized he had dozed off. The sky was a light overcast; they had spent the entire night at the hospital. Armitage almost wept again, all notions of reverting to his former ‘soldier’ brainwashing abandoned when confronted with Ben’s stoic face. He thought the worst aloud, “No…”

“Armitage, Bella’s still alive,” was all Ben had to say as Armitage wiped his face and found the tears were still falling. Terror segueing into relief, before then segueing into anxiety. He was greeted with a cup of water from the female officer. She never told him her name, and he never asked.

It wasn’t until another hour that the doctor came out. Ben was optimistic, so Armitage tried to be as well, but what parent could be when their child was stabbed by some creepy child murderer? So, he just sat there with his umpteenth cup of water, leaning into Ben, his head in the crook of his neck. He didn’t care about the weird looks they were getting for being a same sex couple, the ridiculously backwards yet persistent view on homsexuality completely secondary. He just wanted Bella to be safe.

“We had to do more than what we thought because a few of her organs were severed in the single knife wound, but she thankfully didn’t need an organ transplant. This girl,” the doctor paused as he addressed the small sleeping blond, Emily, curled up in a seat, “Saved your daughter’s life.”

“Can we see Bella now?” Armitage’s voice was hoarse, from crying. Still dehydrated despite the attempts of his loved ones to refuel him as the hours passed. The doctor nodded as he waited for them to wake up Emily. Then they went to the ICU. The scent was purely sick old people. They saw Bella, and she had on a mask and a mass of tubes. Armitage ran up to her, cupping her chin. He smothered her face with kisses and soft kind words while being as conscious of the equipment as possible. Ben sat next to the bed, kissing Bella on the head and hugging her.

~*~*~

Kylo opened her eyes and went to rub them, but the swelling in her hand from punching the wall made her wince. She reviewed the extent of the bruising. She couldn’t even move her finger. Sighing, she cursed herself as she caught the sight of the dent in the wall.

Getting dressed, she made a visit to the med bay, something that just reminded her of that horrid night, ignoring the phantom pain in her side.

**Author's Note:**

> [Give this song a listen on Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/track/5rAJIWGXVlXtVCnxTpWu5q?si=Sb1gdoWoSAKY4VYVztFTXA)   
>  [And here is the youtube link if you don't like to use Spotify](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QcB51jkAok)


End file.
